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A
STRANGER IN TOWN
Copyright 2002 Robert P. Herbst. All rights
reserved.
It
was only a few days ago when Yodar Hoopelhoffer,
the Mount Perry town idiot, ambled down North
Jefferson Street in the company of a small
hairy, bipedal, creature. It was unlike anything
anyone in this town had ever seen before.
It
was walking upright on its hind legs, and it was
completely covered with a thick coat of dark
brown, coarse looking hair. Its beady little
eyes were set deep in the facial hair as was a
small black nose. Under all this was a mouth
full of very sharp looking teeth. Its ears were
located high on its head and their points just
shown above the hair. It had five fingers on
each hand, with opposable thumb, and five toes
on each foot complete with toe and finger nails,
all neatly trimmed. Although no one else could
understand a word of what was being said; the
creature seemed to be carrying on a conversation
with Yodar. It was fairly obvious Yodar was
enjoying the conversation. Unfortunately, there
was no way to tell what the mood of the creature
was because of all the
hair on its face. The two moved through Mount
Perry and on to Yodar's house where they went
inside like old friends. Within moments of the
first sighting, members of the world famous
Mount Perry Zoological Society were called to
the scene to make a determination of exactly
what kind of creature was visiting Yodar. In the
past, Yodar had brought home some rather strange
and sometimes quite dangerous wild animals. At
the very least, this thing was strange looking.
With its sharp looking teeth, it could very well
be dangerous. Looking in through the living room
window they found Yodar and the creature
drinking what looked like tea from Yodar's best
porcelain cups. They seemed to be swapping jokes
from the way the two of them were laughing it
up.
However,
even with long distance listening devices, no
one could understand a word that was being said.
Yodar had long claimed, he spoke fluently in 52
different languages. The world acclaimed Mount
Perry Linguistic Society was never able to
identify more than two of the languages. Now it
seemed, we were listening to the third of the
identifiable languages even though no one
understood it.
Yodar
was invited to bring his guest outside but the
request was refused. Yodar said his guest did
not want to be interviewed. A similar demand
from the Mount Perry Police Department met a
similar fate. It seemed quite evident, Yodar had
no intention of sharing his guest with anyone
else at this time.
The
police department immediately surrounded the
house with armed patrolmen to make sure the
creature stayed where it was until some
determination could be made as to exactly what
the creature was. Naturally the first
speculation was; it was some sort of dwarf or
young "Big Foot" monster. This idea
gained favor as time went on and pictures of the
hairy little creature, taken through Yodar's
window, were distributed.
As
the day wore on the Mount Perry Zoological
Society decided it was nothing more than some
very shy species of dumb animal that had
wandered the swamps around Mount Perry, unseen,
for generations. It was able to converse with
Yodar because Yodar was also considered dumb.
The two of them shared a similar mentality and
were able to exchange ideas at this level.
In
due course it was decided to trap the animal and
put it in a cage at the Zoo. Mr I. Katchum,
Mount Perry's expert on trapping wild and
dangerous animals, was brought into the picture
and instructed to catch the animal unhurt as a
zoological specimen Mr. Katchum called in his
team of 60 or so helpers. Katchum and his gang
of thugs moved in on the house with great
stealth. Once in position around the house, a
signal was given. Mr. Katchum and all of his 60
helpers charged into the house wielding nets and
clubs. After a brief struggle the creature was
brought out of the house wrapped securely in
nets. It just seemed to be resting in the net,
its arms folded across its chest, with a,
"What the Hell is this all about?"
expression on its face.
Yodar
protested loudly over the removal of his friend
saying, "This is my friend! You have no
right to invade my home and remove him."
The police brushed him aside and made off to the
zoo with Mr. Katchum and their prize. After all,
Yodar was the Mount Perry town idiot, what did
he know. Yodar wailed, "You don't know what
you're doing. This is an intelligent creature
and an advanced emissary from another world bent
on expansion into less civilized worlds. All
you're doing is demonstrating we're not
civilized." No one paid him the slightest
attention.
The
new guest at the zoo just sat down against the
back wall of its cage and watched the curious
crowd wander by staring at him. It seemed to
have no interest at all in what was going on.
Toward evening the creature got up and wandered
over to the door to its cage and examined the
lock in detail.
Just
after dark, there was a muffled explosion at the
zoo. Shortly thereafter the creature was seen
racing through the town and out into the swamps.
Mr. Katchum and his gang raced into the swamps
shortly thereafter intent on recapturing the
creature. Yodar sat on his front porch watching
what was going on. His only comment was,
"You're going to be sorry you did this.
About
ten minutes after Mr. Katchum and his gang
entered the swamp, there was a huge ball of blue
light and a sizzling sound way off in the
underbrush. Minutes later Katchum and his gang
reemerged from the swamp on the run, completely
naked, hairless and scorched to a dark brown
color. Wild eyed with fear, Katchum pointed over
his shoulder and said, "Watch Out! The
hairy little beast is armed! Run for your
lives!" Before he could speak another word,
there was a low pitched hum and a circular
looking, silver colored object rose up out of
the swamp. The object zoomed in very low over
the town of Mount Perry and "ZAPPED"
the entire town with a blue ray that left the
entire population naked, hairless and scorched
like Katchum's gang. All that is except Yodar,
who still sat on his porch nodding his head as
he murmured, "I told you you'd be
sorry." The object then swooped low over
Yodar's home and wobbled its wings once or twice
before it vanished soundlessly into the night
sky. |
