|
Humorous
newspaper column re Beckham's pre World Cup
party
The frenzy is
almost upon us. The Soccer World Cup is soon to
start and the excitement has been building in
Earnest, … and Fred and Andy since the
beginning of the year. Oh, in order to avoid
being labelled sexist I’d better mention all
the Jane’s and Charlottes etc.etc who are
equally excited by the prospect.
There was recently an event which temporarily
overshadowed the sporting angle. David Beckham,
the England team’s young and charismatic
captain hosted, with his wife Victoria (ex Spice
Girls), a major bash at their huge home north of
London. The four hundred or so guests were drawn
from the showbiz elite and wannabe stars.
Beckham’s soccer team mates were also there.
International celebs also littered the scrubbed
wood floors. Sting and Joan Collins plus pop
stars. U2’s Bono was there. Mick Hucknall of
Simply Red …I could go on and on but that
would be dull. You get the picture I hope. Just
in passing, does anyone else think of a dog’s
treat when they hear the name Bono or is that an
English thing?
The party was held at the couple’s home which
is affectionately named Beckingham Palace by the
press boys. Naturally enough as The World Cup is
being hosted by two countries, Japan and Korea,
the theme was Asia. Except the dress code. I
have never seen in the six years I lived in
Asia, the workers in the paddy fields wearing
White Tie or Diamonds. Now that is not to say
they don’t own such things. For all I know,
their homes and villages may be stuffed full of
silk and rocks. All I’m saying is, I’ve
never seen it.
The walkway through the gardens was flanked by
energetic, martial artists kicking and punching
the air as the guests passed by. Whether they
were bored, body-guards killing time (and
mosquitos probably) or performers was unclear
but suffice to say the guests were all well
behaved as they proceeded. That was until they
came across the human praying mantiss. Shrieks
of alarm came as the big brown statue sprang to
life. I’m sure that’s why the press
photographer chose to stand there. Nothing like
a celebrity legging it past in a panic for good
copy.
The main event of the evening was the auction in
aid of a children’s charity and was staggering
to witness. I have a pair of training shoes
which cost approximately $15 US and I balked at
paying that much. But then again, I’m not a
celebrity chef. Jamie Oliver forked out $47,560
for a pair of used,…yes, used trainers worn by
Beckham and this was matched for a second pair
by another guest.
Anyway, I digress. Back to the football
(soccer). Even more surprising than someone
paying a huge amount of money for smelly, old
trainers is the discovery that such is
Beckham’s appeal internationally and also
almost all of the English Premiere Division
players, some Japanese football fans were openly
declaring allegiance to England in favour of
their own country. I’m not sure if the TV
reporters had slipped them a few rice wines
previously or a few million yen but they seemed
to be genuine. Such a pity. The reality will
probably not measure up to their expectation.
Hara Kiri anyone? |
